Chances are, they'll grow up to hate you. Why I oppose adult/child sexual relations in practice.Many of us realize that sexual interactions and pleasure are not innately harmful for any human to experience. Many of us understand that it is the context in which these experiences happen that causes harm. For instance, force, fraud, bribery, blackmail, pain etc. will all cause harm to the individual victim to it in a sexual relationship. Most people in general agree with this.
Our modern culture likes to add an additional factor, age. They claim that a big enough age difference causes harm. There is no truth to this, to be clear (and I will be making a post one day focusing on that), but there are issues that we, as pro-contact MAPs, have to be aware of due to this cultural norm.
I believe this post is important to make as I do not want people to take my theoretical positive view of adult/child sexual relations as support, encouragement or promotion of such relationships in our current culture. I actively oppose such relationships in our current culture.
They will grow up to hate you.
It is a very rare thing that a child grows up, after having sexual relations with an adult, and is perfectly fine with it. For the most part, if not found out by other parties, the first thing that happens is a re-contextualizing of their memories. Most people, whether they will admit it or not, do not want to go against the grain. Most people want to fit in well with society and culture. Most people get very uncomfortable going against dominant narratives. A child may enthusiastically and happily enjoy a sexual relationship with an adult but as they grow and social acceptance becomes more important, they are very likely to alter their perception of the past relationship. This is so it fits a social narrative, so they don't question an insanely powerful social stigma. Most often these people will claim they were ignorant, tricked and deceived. They will then impart a selfishness upon the adult, that the adult just used them and didn't care about them. They instill shame on their past enjoyment and the memory becomes tainted. From this develops anxiety, depression, attachment issues and even PTSD. This would be considered sociogenic harm. Harm from society, from cultural norms. The harm was not from the relationship or actions but from social factors.
Now, there is also the likely issue that the relationship gets out. See, if you are a kind MAP then you are not going to make threats or scare the child. There will be no "if you tell anyone I will hurt you" or any fear instilled into the situation (doing so will instill harm and you are a terrible person for doing so). Even if you ask the child to keep it a secret, kids love sharing things that excite them. Kids love taking about people and activities they love. It is very likely, at some point, the child is going to excitedly tell a friend, a teacher, a parent or someone about the fun game they play with one of their favorite adults. Once the cat is out of the bag, we have to deal with iatrogenic harm (there is still also sociogenic harm, especially from everyone telling the child they were abused). This is harm caused by medical professionals but in this case apples to therapists. The therapists job is to make sure the child feels harmed. That they "realize" they were abused. That the adult was an abuser and manipulated them, hurt them and lied to them. In essence, telling the child that they weren't truly loved but just used as an object. However, the harm from professionals does not end there. The police, courts and judges all contribute to this. Even after all this, seeing an adult they loved get put in prison is very harmful as well and the child will blame themselves.
To put it bluntly, a little girl is not harmed because someone older than her stimulated pleasure receptive nerves between her legs as she giggled and said keep going. A little girl is harmed because of the gauntlet she is put through socially, therapeutically and legally for daring to share that pleasure with someone deemed too old (remember, if she does it herself or with someone about her age then all the professionals suddenly deem it fine and normal).
This is why I oppose adult/child sexual relationships in practice. I will not say they will all end up like this, but the vast majority will. It is NOT worth the mental health and life of someone you love to have some moments of sexual pleasure. It simply is not worth it. We are intellectuals and we need to act as such.
The child will be harmed my friends, not directly by you... but you might as well have lit the fuse.
Published on 16 August 2021.
Published on 16 August 2021.
child abuse, pedophilia, sexuality, children, sex, harm, culture, society
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